currently feeling blank which is so not me.. i have so many things to say but the moment i opened my blogger, it just disappeared.. i dont know.. it feels like something is missing.. suddenly i felt numb.. that my mind is just doing something because I HAVE TO not because i want to.. i have to do this and that or else.. when can i do something for myself? ok, i can buy a lot of stuff for me, myself and i but i’m not happy.. I’M NOT! i feel so greedy cause GOD gave me alot since i got here and here i am still wanting more.. what happened to me?
i said that we are better of friends than have something to hold on to.. i feel like its time.. it won’t work.. all the negativity is kicking in that’s why i decided to stop.. i didn’t sleep well cause i’m waiting for him to say “we can do it..” but no reply.. i slept crying.. i totally understand that he got a life of his own and i do too but what i’m asking is just a moment.. is it too much? this has been going on and on eversince we met.. he won’t be sending a message to me for a week, then i’ll worry.. and then after a week, we are back together again.. i want this to stop.. it’s not because i don’t love him no more but because i’m getting tired.. i love him so much that i’m letting him go (too much drama i know!) i’m still hoping for the best to happen.. i know we will meet again..
